Ridiculous customer complaints

Today I had a customer return a meal (on the menu it says crispy skin salmon), because the salmon has skin on it. Geez....

bwahahahaaa....probably thought Crispy Skin Salmon was a type of salmon like Sockeye or King.

"The Crispy Skin Salmon, a native of the South Pacific. This fish has the rare distinction of hauling itself onto land to sun itself on the beaches of tropical islands. Due to the similar texture and color of its skin it was thought to have been originally related to the Crispy Skin Trout, found in and along the banks of isolated streams of Southern California.":p:p:p

Personally witnessed by myself at a buffet:

"Oooh, what's this?"
"Smoked salmon M'am"
"Oh. Does it taste, like, you know, fishy?"

What do you say? No, actually it tastes alot like chicken?

I had a customer INSIST that I put banana in a hazelnut chiffon cake I made for her. I don't even keep bananas or banana flavoured ANYTHING in the shop.

Same customer orders another cake...insists that that cake was not the same as the one I made for her last time. I tell her it is indeed the same cake. She says no--the last one was TALLER.

Same customer orders yet another cake....insists that this cake was not the same as the previous cake she purchased from me. I was VERY thorough in getting all the details from her because I KNOW she is a pain in the rump. She wanted strawberries for a garnish. So I loaded that thing up to the gunnels with strawberries...it was most definitely banana free....it was tall....it had strawberries....What's her beef? The last cake had a few strawberries dipped in chocolate!

I give up.

This is the same customer who doesn't want butter or sugar in anything because it's "too rich" but goes nuts for my pecan pie tarts (no pun intended). One of us is insane...and I'm sure it's not me!

Don't even get me started on the vegan nutter (no offence to vegans but this lady truly was nuts) and the stunt she pulled at the last restaurant I worked for....

My baker's assistant gave me a great line for the pain in the rump cake lady....when she says that this cake is not the same cake as the last one I can say "No--this is a different cake. You ate that cake. You can't have your cake and eat it too!"

hAD A PATRON ORDERED BLACKENED REDFISH. She sent it back because she did not like the darkened color?????????? I told waiter to tell her she was guilty of discrimination.

Steak Tartar and Tuna Sashimi sent back because it was raw and I swear to you they asked if I could make the Steak Tartar Medium!!!! and and also fully cook the Tuna.

I guess the cracker barrel doesnt serve Steak Tartar?=)

While working at a place near Atlanta, I got an order for a well done Filet but the guest wanted no Char and not butterflied. Considering this was a 14oz filet and the thing was dang near 4 inches think I tried to explain that it would be virtually impossble to not get any char, especially using the grill we had.....wood fired.....and not butterflying it. Still insisted but I figured out how to get this done and sent it out. This thing was beautiful, for a well done steak that is ;). Just a light marking but it took all sides to do it.

They sent it back and said it was too rare and wanted it fixed. I swear there was not a lick of pink to this steak....but the catch was that the guest insisted on a new steak. Now I'm a firm believer that the guest is always the reason but this time I about lost it. Unfortunately the owner insisted that we accomodate them.

So...... I threw a new steak on. Now, I didn't do anything that would be seen in a movie on Comedy Central like "Waiting" but I did, out of spite..... destroy the steak allbeit by cooking method but that's it. I think this was also the only time I ever did this but there was a rough time at that place with ending up working 18 hours a day for the 3 days prior and then3 fights with ownership about various things that day..........:mad:

We had a microwave. Only one, as I hated them, but we needed to heat desserts. Owners insisted too. I marked the steak, nuked it (won't say how long :rolleyes: ) and then refinished it on the grill.

This thing looked like a grey, shriveled up hockey puck. Delivered it personally to the guest, waited for the guest to cut into it and asked if it was okay. Guest said that was fine.

Later on, the server said the guest sent compliments to me for making the very best steak they had ever eaten. :eek:

I had one customer ask me if I had any vegan free desserts. And yes, I can honestly say that all of my desserts are PEOPLE FREE. Honestly....

long ago and far away, a guest complained about the stringy melted emmenthaler on the french onion soup....? it's not parm, it has elasticity.

My favorite are the ones that don't like something and haven't tried it yet.

Nuked steak, right up there with deep fried.....
I was once a recipient of a nuked prime rib, Natichodoes LA circa 1983.....there's a jeune si quoi that only a microwave contributes to texture of proteins.

I'm quite surprised that anything other than a new steak was an option. The code in most municipalities requires that once an item leaves the kitchen and is served, it cannot be returned to the kitchen for additional preparation and re-serving. This is, to the best of my knowledge, immutable code everywhere, if the item has been touched, in any manner, by the customer.

Steve, this was 16 years ago in 1993. The business standards and health codes regarding returns hadn't gotten that far yet. We even had recook/refire tickets to make sure the food wasn't sent out to the wrong table by mistake. Back then, steak was one of those things you brought up if it wasn't to the guests liking, replated and sent it back out.

Although not to early in my career...it was early enough that I hadn't come to the conclusion that I would just fire a new one, no questions asked. Although I will say that most other dishes...ie; salads, sands, pastas and apps were all re made. Just part of a personal and industry learning curve. It's just about a guarantee that most anyone who started in this business after 1995 would be shocked at what we were able to get away with back then.:rolleyes:;)
Thinking back......I know I am .....just a bit. :lol:

"Steve, this was 16 years ago in 1993. The business standards and health codes regarding returns hadn't gotten that far yet...."

Gee, as a "fry cook" in 1969, I knew better than to "recycle" food that went out to a table!

Even "wrapped" crackers, butter, bread baskets, etc., were discarded.

It is beyond my comprehension that ANYTHING that leaves the kitchen for service could possibly end up anywhere other than the TRASH!

Really?
You've never had a guest ask for a steak to be cooked just a little longer, and then accomodated that request?
That's hardly what I think of when I hear the phrase "recycle food".
Recycling, at least to me, would mean giving the returned food to a different customer.

Gee, it's just the way the business was back then and my experience in the Chicago and Atlanta markets. It's not like I'm making this sh!t up. :rolleyes:
Pete, I started in this business in 1977, back then every hotel and just about every restaurant I worked at, (as a busboy to dishwasher to line cook) even a premier place like the Stouffer's in Oak Brook IL had a recycle bucket at the dish table for butter, cracker packages and if it were the case....1/2&1/2 containers. They started to disappear more in the 80's with awareness to food contamination thanks to NIFI and local codes but there were common-place in those markets. There were even some hold outs until the early 90's....if I remember correctly McKendrick's steak house in Atlanta Georgia had a butter bucket and they opened in 1995 but I was just a Sous at that place and it wasn't my policy. Having just been let go as the Exec of another place I kinda needed the job to....let's see.....pay for my condo and food maybe. So.............:look:

My father, who actually was an Aircraft Mechanic by training and trade (and a dam good one for over 50 years with UAL), took a second job as the night manager/cook just after they went on strike in the very early 70's. The place was called The Little Corporal. It was in the United of America building in the downtown Chicago Loop. The stories he told me made my stomach turn as a little kid and then found them to be true when I actually went to work.

Personally, I hated many of the standards back then and when I started to work in positions I could affect change, I did so. But as a busboy /dishwasher or Utility cook....... if I wanted the work and experience, I didn't buck the system..... that is unless I wanted be unemployed and or see the business end of a plate, hotel pan and even knives that the Chef would have conveniently thrown for even suggesting that we didn't recycle his precious butter or peeling and scraps.:eek: He!!, we even had slop buckets in the coolers for onion, carrot, celery, tomato, potato scraps as well as beef trim chicken bones/skins scraps for stocks. Again, it was just the way it was back then and part of my point......... what we got away with.

There is no way I am condoning the return of food to a guest and God forbid a different guest now or in the last 20 years unless it was the policy of the owners or my superiors or a general and local industry practice. It's all part of a leaning curve and..... In fact.... something I explained in the second paragraph of my post.
Then again, I guess, even in 1969.... Californian's were just leaps and bounds ahead of us lowly then Midwesterner and (then and now) Southerners. :smiles:

Oh yeah! My apologies to Eloki, the original poster and starter of the topic. I had no idea that a simple off the cuff comment and background to a story of something that happened umpteen years ago would have derailed the original topic. I'm done with this one. ;)

Not a personal one, but i overheard my best friend in the ladies toilet telling someone how she was enjoying my hen night dinner ( I'd taken all my girlfreinds to a steakhouse in my home town.)

She was applauding the starter, but complaining bitterly that her peppered steak was "Far too peppery"

Just as well i was sitting down or id have pee'd myself laughing

That was 18 years ago... I've since discovered that one can ruin a peppered steak if the incendury powder is not separated from the ground pepper first.

If ur readin this Jan, sorry I took the p(*&* :D

We had a lady recently return a salad because there was lettuce in it and a customer who was allergic to chocolate ice cream request chocolate sauce on her vanilla ice cream.

Oh I remember a couple more......well maybe ridiculous requests more than complaints.......

Had a guest order a baked French onion soup.....no onions please.

I cooked an omelet for Gene Simmons once...back in 1993. I was at a place at Colony Square in Atlanta. He wanted all egg whites with a ton of veggies but absolutely no oil. Not even food release. Same with the hash browns. Took me 6 tries to get the dang thing out of the pan in a condition that even closely resembled an omelet. Finally I walked the omelet out to the table and explained to him what it took. He said he was ****ing with me and just wanted to see if there was a Chef that could get it done. He said I was the first and invited me to sit with him for a while. Made the effort entirely worth it!:D;)

for what it's worth, 1979 in Memphis fine dining.....we had a butter bucket, that's were clarified butter came from.:eek:

And waiters would eat reminants off guest's plates.....unless the customer was a kid or aged, something about spitting on the food.

I've seen local STL resturants refire an underdone steak......this is even in the new millenium.:p

This really wasn't a complaint, but I have to mention it because it was an absolute riot. One sunday night, I was forced to work the line because everyone called in sick. I work at a Sushi bar, and basically all the line cooks in the kitchen do is fry up tempura and make simple apps. When we do shrimp tempura, we use shelled Tiger shrimp, but with the head on. (we feel its more authentic that way.) Anyway an elderly couple about in their late 60's ordered the shrimp tempura. I prepared it and sent it out. Next thing I know the server comes back into the kitchen and tells me that a customer would like to see me. So i went into the dining room and asked the gentleman if he had a problem with anything. He said to me, "Sonny, this dish looks beautiful, but I cant eat anything that's looking back at me." His wife then replied, "that isn't what you said in the bedroom last night".

I hit the floor.

Customer writing on the comment card, that the 300g rare black angus Scotch Fillet he requested was the fattiest, and therefore worst quality steak he ever had....

When I was working for Chili's: a... large... guest pulled me aside and began to tell me there wasn't enough "brown sauce" at the bottom of her bowl (she was eating an awesome blossom, a deep fried large onion that is cut to resemble a flower). I looked at what she was pointing at and I said "Ma'am... that's grease." She gives me a blank stare and says "I don't care I want more to dip the onion in!" ....So, I went back to the kitchen and spooned some in a ramekin from the fryer, put it in the freezer for a second and brought it out to her and when I walked by again it was gone.

Reminds of the times when we would use the ends of bread loaves under our bacon and sausage for a breakfast buffet.
Occasionally this bread would disappear.
MMMM, grease soaked heels, yum yum.

Once, I had a waitress tell me that a customer wanted to speak with me.
When I got to the table this obviously overly intoxicated man told me that he ordered a porterhouse steak.
I looked at his plate, and there was a porterhouse on it, so I said "yes, it looks like you received what you ordered".
He angrily said that it wasn't a porterhouse.
His wife put her hand on his wrist, obviously trying to calm him (poor women, she looked like this happens often).
He said that he was a butcher for 30 years, and he knows what a porterhouse looks like, and this wasn't one, a porterhouse doesn't have a bone.
So, in my nicest manner, I said "well, I don't claim to know everything, but isn't a porterhouse from the same cut as the t-bone, with the strip loin on one side, and the tenderloin on the other, and as the tenderloin gets larger that's what determines if it's a proterhouse or a t-bone?"
He said yes.
So I said "well, excuse me, but if that's what it is, and it has no bone, what keeps the two cuts of meat together?"
He just stared at me.
I asked if there was anything else I could do for them, then promptly went back to the kitchen.

Shrimp Cocktail returned because it was cold

NY Strip, no mashed potatoes, sub extra steak (double slap on the forehead for the server that actually put the order through)

Various requests for "well done but no char"

Various situations that involved a guest not liking or being allergic to something that was clearly described and detailed on the menu.

I served a well done steak to a guest, and she saod "I don't want to hurt your feelings, but can I get some A-1 sauce?" I was thinking to myself "Too late, you already did when you asked for it well"

Request for a full rack of lamb to be cut into individual chops and grilled well done. Sent back because she wanted it charred. Sent the chops out charred and black all over. She loved them.

Request for a rack of lamb to be "extra well" done. Dish sent back because it was "overcooked".

I'll post more when I think of them.

That's great! :D I'll have to remember that. Can you sub the fries for Lobster tails?:smoking:

It is like people forget to read when they are out...and then they think it is okay to act like dummies!!

did have a lady ask for our seafood louie (shrimp, dungeness crab and smoked salmon with the usual mixings) no lettuce or veges, sub seafood.

She did say she didn't care what it cost, so i did some quick math (menu price x2) and cheerfully served it. She paid, left a $10 tip and ate there for luch once a week and ordered the same thing untill the menu changed. Almost the one and only time where doing something off menu and charging appropiatley for it paid off.

Don't get me started on the people that split an entree, want each half of the protein at a different doneness, each wanting a different 1/2 order of veggies, starch, and sauce.

This is why most restaurants charge a fee for splitting an entree because of cheapskate dumbasses like this. "Yes, we'd like to split a New York Sirloin; I'd like mine almost medium rare and my wife would like hers well done, but not too well done, but not too charred, but also not too burned. I'd like mine with a half order of steamed asparagus, and mashed potatoes, but I want the potatoes to be made with sour cream instead of butter, and my wife wants the mashed potatoes to be made with butter, but no sour cream and she wants her asparagus grilled with a little olive oil and lemon juice."

Yes, this really happens.

One of the more annoying customer complaints I had came on a Chateaubriand. The customer wanted it well-done but not charred, for starters.:rolleyes: The Chateaus we served were cut from a very large section of a pretty good sized tenderloin, so of course I groaned at the 1/2 hour it would take to cook it. I did cook it to his specified temp (and verified with my Thermopen) only to have him send it back as too well done.:mad: I advised the server I'd make him a new one but it would take another 1/2 hour. This time I sent it out MW and he loved it.

At the same place I had a server ring in an order for a med-rare 12 oz sirloin. She warned me that the lady told her she often sends the steak back a couple times because she's picky about her MR. I procede to cook it to the specified temp and send it out; predictably it's returned as not done enough. I cook it (yeah, the same steak) a bit more, same result. After about 4 times it's MW, verging on Well, and the customer is delighted. This demonstrates that the customer isn't always right, is sometimes an idiot, and also that she'd have better luck if she had even the faintest idea what temperatures mean before she just pulled one out of her ***.