Hey all. Thank you all for all your thoughts and good wishes. All in all the trip to Florida wasn't one of my better vacations, but I did get to see my family and spend some good time with all of them. Including ones I haven't seen for many years!
AS it turns out Dads heart finally had enough! The bypass was an effort to save a sinking ship. Without it he would not have lasted the year, perhaps even the month. As I was flying to Florida I saw some older folks wheelchair bound and decrepit. I'm not saying being in a wheelchair is a bad thing, but some of these people were just hanging on by threads it appeared. I don't think Dad would have done well like that. It wouldn't have been in his nature to be like that, so I am glad he didn't have to be. He went pretty quickly and peacefully. At the funeral there were well over 100 people in attendance. When I got up to do my eulogy I thanked everybody for coming and then remarked that seeing all these people made me realize that..."i've got to get more friends"
It was nice hearing so many people say so many nice things about him. Dad and I had a strained relationship for many years. Towards the end we had a very cordial one, warm enough but never quite like I would have liked. But I did get to see how everyone else saw him, quirks and all and realized that he was really quite a guy. A warm, well read, outspoken and extremely intelligent man. Everything I would like to be myself. I have no regrets that things were left unspoken though perhaps some things were. But I felt good after my eulogy and every issue I ever had with the man melted away. None of it was important anymore. Our relationship adversarial as it was also helped make me into a better person. I doubt that was his plan, but what he wasn't able to teach me in "readin, ritin, and 'rithmatic he was able to instill in me caring, compassion and empathy and when all is said and done, I think I like that better.
For 81 years he managed to dodge the end, and the end came when it was supposed to. He didn't go out with a whimper nor a bang, but he went out with his head held high whether he knew it or not, and I don't think he really knew what a wake he left behind.
So thanks for all your thoughts and just so's ya know, I am more proud to be Jerry Goldsmith's son, then I ever was before!
Thanks gang!
I'm back and thank you 
That in itself is a fine trait that not everyone possesses. I know that loss has its pases, and that your emotions will continue to change over time, but I'm so happy to hear how well you're doing, and that you have no regrets. Sometimes a death in the family can really stregthen other realtionships in your life as well. All my best to you, chrose. 
