The owner is an *******

[Stranger]

He seems to ***** at me a lot whenever he is there. Then all the kitchen managers say I'm doing a great job. The other cooks say that he is just giving me a hard time. I do take what he says into consideration, it seems like he's really pushing me though. He says I'm too slow and I have to go faster, but then the managers are saying I'm fast and doing really good work... The next day he is all nice to me... WTF?

I really give it my all and I push myself extra everyday too and always looking for ways to improve. I work faster than my peers even. I'm afraid he'll fire me though. What should I do, I'd like to be professional about it, but sometimes I just say sorry and that's it

Maybe he is just testing my character? How should I handle this, let it roll off my back?

[cheflayne]

When I went to culinary I had already been working full time in the industry for 10 years. I had two elective classes that were week long classes taught by guest instructors. Both guest instructors told me that if I ever wanted to work in the industry, I was going to have to get faster. Funny thing is neither one of them had ever worked in a professional kitchen, they were cookbook authors. Twenty years later, I am still in the kitchen, and they are still writing books. At one of the first restaurants that I worked I was talking with the owner, a couple of years into the job, and he told me that when I first started he didn't think I stood a chance, too slow. He went on to say that he took some time to really watch me at work and he realized that I was getting the job done faster than other people, I just didn't look like it.
How hands on is this owner and is it in a kitchen capacity? I am not saying to disregard his input, just put it in perspective. Input from other people can be one of our greatest tools for improvement, but we have to be brutally honest with ourselves in order for it to be of use to us. Not an easy thing to do! Listen to input, use that which is valuable and discard the rest.

[Stranger]

The owner is there most days and yes it is in a kitchen of a chain restaurant. Once in a while he works the grill. Other times he helps at prep. He's usually out of there early though. I think he does these hardcore checks once in a while. Maybe I just don't understand the management of a restaurant yet... Is this how they keep people on their toes? It's not only me, he complains to everyone about something. I still fear that he'll fire me though...

Is there anything I could do to make this situation better? I think I need to speak with the kitchen managers first since they keep saying I'm doing good work... I told the owner this and he said only my opinion counts, it is my business... Last month he told me that I have come a long way and he wants me to take it up another notch.

[mredikop]

I will tell you that often owners have no "bed-side manner". Just seems like this guy is prickly and riding everybody because he expects the best out of everyone.

The strongest steel is forged from the hottest fire. So if you can weather this guy and win him over I think you will be in great shape. Also if you move on to a place where the owner is a bit more laid back it will make you appreciate it that much more.

As far as what he says about it not mattering what the managers say that is bogus. If he didn't value their input he wouldn't be employing them.

[McB]

Unfortunetly we work in a industry full of ego. And this is one of the things I hate about the industry. But it isn't going change over night so you are going to have to learn a way to deal with the egos that will always creep in. I would suggest talking to your kitchen managers about the problem and how you feel about it. Chances are they may have his (the owner) ear. Remember it's them you should really have to answer too. (Chain of command.) Are you fairly new in the kitchen? Perhaps he's just one of the those people who needs to dump on the little guy to make himself feel good? Who knows. But if the food gets pumped out at decent pace and in good form then that should count for something.
A little saying that helps me get by people like that is; "Let the fire burn in them, not in you."

[powers]

I don't know a single cook or chef that has not been where you are. Life is full of egos. There's a recipe for it though:

3 oz of HOT A*$ kitchen
6 oz male ego
2 cups low pay
12 lbs hard work
1/2 TS perfectionism
a dash of rebellion
a bunch of people spending 80-90 hrs a week with each other that may or may not get along

Mix it all together at high speed, pour into the smallest kitchen possible and garnish with a boss that CAN'T be pleased

I was always told that if you want something bad enough you are willing to do anything necessary to get it. But please learn from other's mistakes, I spent too long in lose-lose situations that only wasted my time. Have self respect but keep in mind who's home turf you're on.

I hope it all works out for you. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

[Entropy]

Is this guy a suit or a chef?

Don't let it rattle you. He may just be testing you, that's been done to me.

What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

If you do get fired, its not a big deal, someone else will hire you. Life's too short for that kinda stuff.

There is no rhyme or reason to explain people in this oh so fickle business of ours.

I never apologize for my mistakes, haha I never even say thank you when I get compliments for the food. Because I just take it all as input. If I make a mistake and get yelled at, I say 'OK' and then fix it or learn from it. If I'm told something is good I say 'Ok' and keep it that way. I don't waste my time or the manager's time making apologies. (Of course, if he's really going on a tirade and making it personal that might be different. But that's never happened to me before.) Its all about the work to me. Even if the guy's a psycho.

Its important to not take anything personally. If you do, that will destroy you and affect your work. Just do the best you can, only time and experience can make you better. The owner is well aware of that, even if he doesn't show it.

Also, power trippers can smell fear, so learn to hide it. When I am at work, I am all cajones (and I'm a girl and have to be xtra tough.) When I leave, I'm totally different. Different faces for different places.

Lastly, always remember why you are there. I assume you love food and you love to cook, so just keep your focus and keep it together. If this guy is truly trying to intimidate you, don't let it. He may just be sadistically going beyond what is normal, and you can't let some jerk like that win. I don't care if he is the boss, its one thing to be yelled at in the interest of getting better, but abuse is a whole other issue which you don't have to live with.

[foodpump]

Stranger: Remember back in grade school, when the new subsitute teacher came in? Without thinking, every kid, even the sweetest little girl, gave the sub the guns, finding out her limits. Nothing personal, just happens natural.

The owner sounds like he runs a fairly tight ship if he's sticking his head and hands in the kitchen. He's taking a gamble on you, if you make good both you and he look good, if not, he looks bad, and he still has to pay you. Granted, the guy is harsh, but not an ogre. Like everyone else says, focus on doing a good job and let the owner's remarks slide in one ear and out the other. The other guys telling you you're doing good? Take it as a compliment, but also realize that when the owner's eye is on you, it's away from them. They're gratefull it's not them geting the inspection.

[DMT]

First point, I no longer work in the food industry (not for 30 years) but from a business standpoint, I see a couple of things that are telling me that you are not being singled out for the shredder...

"He seems to ***** at me a lot whenever he is there. Then all the kitchen managers say I'm doing a great job. The other cooks say that he is just giving me a hard time. I do take what he says into consideration, it seems like he's really pushing me though. He says I'm too slow and I have to go faster, but then the managers are saying I'm fast and doing really good work... The next day he is all nice to me... "

The owner doesn't hate you. If he did, you'd be gone a long time ago. He has a lot riding on his staff, and it sounds like he sees you as a promisimg prospect for future advancement. That is what I read out of your other comments below. We'll get to those now...

"The owner is there most days and yes it is in a kitchen of a chain restaurant. Once in a while he works the grill. Other times he helps at prep. He's usually out of there early though. I think he does these hardcore checks once in a while. Maybe I just don't understand the management of a restaurant yet... Is this how they keep people on their toes? It's not only me, he complains to everyone about something. I still fear that he'll fire me though... "

A chain restaurant where the owner is a franchisee is a huge investment (and if this is his only franchise, you can bet he probaly has all of his eggs in one basket). That makes for a lot of stress for the owner, and some of that is going to trickle down to (or explode all over) the staff. I bet if you were to talk to the FOH, you'd hear about how they can't do anything right, either...
Maybe there were some financial problems that were making him crazier than normal, I don't know, and you shouldn't ask...
The owner sounds to be "hands on" which means he isn't above getting his hands dirty, too. This is a trait which might simply let you know that he has an inkling of what it takes to get the food out, and is not above pitching in where his efforts might help get the day rolling or the customers served.
Take comfort in the fact that the other folks are getting ragged at, too. That shows that it's not just you. Small consolation, but take what you can get...

"Is there anything I could do to make this situation better? I think I need to speak with the kitchen managers first since they keep saying I'm doing good work... I told the owner this and he said only my opinion counts, it is my business... Last month he told me that I have come a long way and he wants me to take it up another notch."

The last two sentences in the above tell a ton.
First, he sees his restaurant as a business, and not a popularity contest. He may value the opinions of his kitchen managers, but does not base his decisions solely on their input. He's in the kitchen and takes his own notes.
The last part is the kicker.
He's watched you progress, likes what he sees, and thinks you have untapped promise to be better.
You might take the initiative to mention to him that you would be interested to learn what his ideas are to get you to that next level/notch. Specifically, what do *you* need to improve upon, and does he have any suggestions on how to help you succeed.
Point blank, improving your skills/output/technique generates increased production, hopefully satisfied customers, and that means that you *both* have succeeded.
Try to look at this as an opportunity to excell, and at the very least, you'll have some valuable learning experience.
Not that it's crucial for the situation, but you never mentioned how long you've been in the industry, and I get the impression that this may be your first job in a commercial kitchen. If so, the jitters are to be expected.
As a final point, don't paralyze yourself over the prospect of having to unexpectedly find other employment. Work hard, work smart, and absorb all you can about your current position.
Should you be shown the door, you're taking away more than just your paycheck, you've gained knowledge which makes you more valuable to your next prospective employer.
I believe I can honestly say that *ALL* of us have had the occasion to "don't let the door hit us in the @$$..."
Best of luck!

[Peachcreek]

First let me say one thing that every owner, manager, supervisor and whoever else has to supervise wants to tell every employee. You hare here to do the job. Its not a personal thing. You are not hired to be my little rental friend or because I feel the need to spend money to ruin other peoples' lives. And I definately don't spend money so people can point my personal shortcomings. I'm just another person with a lot of responsibilities who needs other peoples' help to get it done. And in that respect I need to rely on you.....
That being said. Just go talk to the guy and don't be afraid to do it. So many people let these things fester when it is usually something either insignificant or miscommunicated between the two parties. Either sit down and figure out what you or he think is wrong and try to fix it or it will give you both a graceful way to part ways without having to feel like enemies. No big deal. Really.
Good luck.

[mlansing]

Well, I don't have a whole lot to add. It has been said. I wouldn't be worry about being fired. I think the manager would not do that. He has to justify that to the owner and seems that the owner like you and your good job!

Good luck