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i also cant tell when steak is rare, md rare, md, ect. how can i tell when something is cooked to the person's expectations
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Purchase an instant-read thermometer, preferably one with an adjustable display. Cooper makes a quality tool for about $4 at your local restaurant supply store.
Also, read up on principles of meat cookery, because there are a lot of factors at play when you produce red meat items. Specifically, there is something called 'momentum' or carry-over cooking. You see, the residual heat trapped inside the target food item will continue to cook from the inside out. As a result, the temperature may read 140, but a few minutes later when you serve your guests/family the item may be medium to medium well-done. With a little understanding of heat transfer and practice, you can grasp the process. Additionally, the shape & thickness of the particular cut of meat you are attempting to cook will play havoc with your timing.
As for recipes, there a quite a few recipe-only sites at which you may want to take a look. Check out:
www.RecipeSource.com www.RecipeCenter.com www.FoodTV.com www.allRecipes.com www.Epicurious.com or post some more specific guidelines and I am sure somebody here could help you out.
Best of luck... and keep cooking!!