ROCK> me <HARDPLACE

[Rivitman]

Any overtime in our kitchen (if there is any) goes only to the best, most useful, and most productive employees. It's not money ill spent.

Labor is expressed to us as a percentage over or under the same period the prior year, with no consideration as to total revenues, costs, or results.

As to power, I would point out that there is total, irrevocable disconnect between the chef/kitchen, and sales/ownership. There is little to no consulation over menu/pricing/food costing with the chef or myself. There is none at all over the labor required for certain menues vs others. Other than outright blackmail, we have no power so to speak, and we both need a paycheck.

In short, we have no idea whatsoever how prices are set, and ownership isn't interested in giving us any insight. We do have comparisons over the performance of past years however, and we are light years ahead of past crews. But we always seem on the ragged edge.

Neither the GM nor the owners have shown any interest whatsoever. The GM is usually absent from his post (especially when the ownership is not around).

[foodpump]

Rivitman, the history of your place, I can't get it out of mind. 10 Chefs in the last 14 years or was it 14 Chefs in the last 10? That kind of history speaks volumes about the owner.

You said the Chef makes lots of money for the owner. Now, your Chef could be running at a 10% labour and 10% f/c, but from the owner's point of view, the Chef doesn't make him any money, the sales dept does. Ah, kiss their golden butts, those guys and gals just keep on hauling in those cheques... As far as most industrial disease owners are concerned, the Chef is just a production manager, he doesn't produce the bucks, just the food.

The "chef of the year" business, can't get it out of my head, and then you describe that top brass throw the Chef in a corner, make sure he has no access to information, and purposely have as little as possible to do with him. In places over-run with industrial disease these are very pronounced traits. Why get friendly with the Chef if you're gonna toss him out in a year? In places over-run with industrial disease you get in a crappy Chef, work him over, fire his butt for screwing up, then get in a good Chef to clean up the mess, then get rid of the good one so you can get another crappy and cheaper one.
So many Chefs leaving, you can't ignore that history, and if the owner AND the GM have been there since firing the first Chef way back when, I can guarantee you they'll be right on track with your Chef, especially since they're not giving him any information, other than more function clip-boards. I'm assuming your Chef is reaching for the golden ring: A bonus of some sort based on volume or food or labour costs. The owner will be very p.o.'d if your Chef actually grabs the ring and claims his prize. ****, he's not suppossed to actually pay out the bonus, it's only like an, oh what's that word? An incentive, that's all.

Christmas is a-coming and you'll be working your butt off, too busy to plan out your escape route for January. Do it now, preferably with your Chef.

[Mannlicher]

One reason I left the food biz was having to deal with all the prima donnas and children with ego problems. Hey, its a job. Just do it.

[Rivitman]

I have to confess that there are more bits to this story. I hoped that in the process of doing the venting Iv'e done so far, an ironclad solution would pop into my head. And I kidded myself that these details were irrelevant.

I would reiterate that from my point of view, the story told so far is 100% accurate. But after today, I fear that this one is going to end soon, and unhappily.

At wits ends, I finally asked another manager why chef was abusing me.
Now I know:

My friend the chef believes I have betrayed him personally.

That was the answer.

Someone told him that I blame him, and him taking the time to care for his wife and brother as the reason for my unhappyness. That I was tired of babysitting the crew while he dealt with these tragic personal issues.
This constitute high treason by chef's standards.

It's not true, it's a gross mischarachterization.

Chef's wife is terminally ill. It may take take five years, maybe more, but her condition is without recourse.

Chef's brother is suicidal, and has been near death several times in the past months.

Chef has his own self destructive behaiviors. He never rests. Never takes time off. On his days off he works till the wee hours on housework, yard work, his brothers home. He doesn't get much sleep by choice. Again, I can not get him to let me help by simply going home and leaving me in charge. Nothing has ever gone wrong in his absence, I see to it. When his wife was having a five way bypass, he spent the day at work. When his brother is in hospitial, he is at his bedside or remodling his house, then naps a bit and drives in to work a full day.

At times, his mood is so sour and hostile he is impossible to cope with. He will ask the same question several times. He will barrage me with questions so rapidfire, five will be put beofore the answer to #1 is even past my lips.And again, he arbitrarily and capreciously overrides my decisions. And he has been giving me a really hard time for a couple of months now. He's sees defect where there is none. Laziness where none exists. His outlook is somewhat conspiratorial,always seeking ulterior motive for actions by anyone that seem unfavorable, such as being late, quitting, or fouling up in the kitchen.

This, plus the workload, puts big pressure on me, and makes me either depressed or ornery.

Everybody in the kitchen knows and talks about his personal difficulties. We all feel horribly for him, and pray for some sort of relief for him.

I try to explain to the crew that chef is tired, or chef is worried, chef is under pressure at home or work,and giving me an exceptionally hard time, and he is angry with me, and that I inappropriatly pass on to them the same anger at times, my tension level having been spiked into redline territory.
I have been wrong here, I admit it. But stretched to wits end it happens. I always regret it and have apologised for 'loosing it' several times.

Chef has always had me to talk to. I have been by his side through some very tough times. I listen to his personal problems and care about the outcome. I have always covered him, and covered for him.

I have nobody to talk to.


And by abuse I mean this: Today he authorized a cook in the kitchen to make work assignments today. And ignore mine. I lost all control over my crew today. Never a word said to me.
Chef had to hurry his wife to hospital this morning. He didn't call me. When he called the kitchen to check up, he told me to hand the phone to the other guy.

Otherguy is a former cook and sous, who abandoned the Chef with a no-notice walkout last december, in the middle of the Christmas rush. Otherguy has had and quit three jobs since, and somehow, begged his way back in.

So unless I can fix this personal strife, I have lost a friend, a mentor, and a job.

No solutions here I suppose. Only hope that cooler heads prevail. But all in all, I'm weary of the politics, and the drama.

[AprilB]

Will make you psychotic. Combine that with stress...

This is not a good mental state to be in while playing around with knives and fire.

Equally not good: Managerial skills. Dealing with reality. Friendship.

I hate to say it, but it looks like you might as well call this place The Titanic Diner.

I feel bad for everyone involved in this situation, but...this ship is sinking and if you can find a lifeboat go for it.

I know you consider him to be your friend and all, which makes it worse. What you have to ask yourself is if you just hired on into this situation, not being a friend of the chef (or the chef you knew), would you tolerate it? I certainly wouldn't consider anyone a 'friend' that treats me like that! Don't get me wrong, I'm sorry for his situation but in the hospitality business you really have to leave it at home. In a 'team' situation (which is what it sounds like you want but the reality of it is ...?) yeah, you treat everyone with respect. Every aspect of it is what makes the restaurant run smoothly.

You have to look at this situation realistically. Staying out of loyalty is one thing, but it seems that it's a one way street at this point. You care, but are having a hard time with why he doesn't care. You know a lot of the reasons why he is the way he is, but they still don't justify his acting the way he does. Plus these things are just going to get worse, not better.

Seriously? Start job hunting. Your loyalty seems to be totally wasted in this instance. (You know, the pearls before swine thing)

April

[Rivitman]

Sadly, I have made the call to start looking.
Even if our professional relationship can be repaired, our friendship is irrevocably damaged. And that was more important to me than any job. If what occurs is not deliberate,or with goodness of heart or not at all, no betrayal can occur. If any offense was comitted, it was strictly unintentional.
No chance has been afforded me to beg pardon. None forthcoming either I imagine.
But what was done towards me in return today was beyond the pale. Bad for me, bad for chef, and bad for the business. It was ment to cause anguish. And it was done based on the flimsiest of heresay.

In less pleasant terms, I am simply a casualty in an incident of culinary road rage. Injured and unable to respond.

The most apt analogy is Melville's Moby Dick.
I have been Ahab's loyal Starbuck,an uncommonly conscientious seaman who despite my misgivings, felt myself bound by my obligations to obey the captain. But Ahab invariably destroyed himself, and all around including Starbuck.

Best regards to Starbuck.

All envy to Ishmael:

"Is he mad? Anyway there's something on his mind, as sure as there must be something on a deck when it cracks."

[jfb1060]

Rivitman,

It appears to me that you have taken this culinary challenge to the point where you are just out of road so to speak.

From everything that has been said I agree that the boat you are on IS sinking, and sinking fast, and it does not appear that it is through any fault of your own.

I would have serious questions about an establishment that has gone through such a large number of executive chefs in 14 years. The problems there seem to go much deeper than just the exec. in the first place.

You appear to be making the best choice in a very bad and volatile situation. I wish you luck.

Joe

[Rivitman]

Even though I have come to a basic conclusion, I'm still having a tough time dealing with the reality of the situation.

Looking at this weeks schedual and contracts, I don't see less than a 66 hour workweek ahead. I'm fortunate that I got a day off yesterday. And I'm going to have to work my staff like coolies as well. And not have them go off on interpersonal hissy fits.

Then I will have 2 new faces to deal with as well.

Chef an I had a sit-down, with him in chef mode, and me in survival mode. Not the best way to fix a problem. Some issues were adressed, some not. Actually, I doubt any were, but for now, I think the chef realizes to some small degree, that I have hit my limits, and has backed off a tiny bit. Very tiny, but perceptable.

But no real difference to me. I'm gearing up for the job search. Most places seem to be digging in for the holidays and have their staffs set, so I'm going to have to do battle and survive for the next ten weeks.

I'll get chef through another holiday season if mind and body can hold up.
The butcher's bill was big last year. Illness and injury shredded the crew. It was as they say, "a near run thing". Save myself and a former intern and one dishwasher, there is nobody left from last years staff.

Then I plan to make a reasonable salary demand of the owners that they will very likely reject (bringing me up to the mean average for the area as documented by the state employment dept).

Then I can use money as the reason for my departure. The Chef doesn't loose face, and maybe I don't loose a shot at a half decent reference.

"Against the wind he now steers for the open jaw," murmured Starbuck to himself, as he coiled the new-hauled main- brace upon the rail. "God keep us, but already my bones feel damp within me, and from the inside wet my flesh. I misdoubt me that I disobey my God in obeying him!"

[Scott Bracken]

Good luck to you