Sending it Back

[DoryD]

Originally Posted by AllanMcPherson

Hi everybody,

I was curious, what are your parameters for sending back a plate of food? There are the obvious, burnt or underdone food, something "gross" on the plate, and the like.

I got to thinking about this over the weekend when I was out having brunch with my wife. I had an omlette, described as "French style" with the triple fold. What I got was a western style scrambled egg mass with ham and cheese scattered through it. I debated with sending it back, just on principle, but in the end I didn't. Bottom line was I was tired after a long week and just wanted some hot food. Still, I basiclly let these guys get away with false advertising.

Any comments?

--Al

I guess it depends for me on a few things...location being one. In the small college town that I live in, there are 4 restaurants (and a few seedy hole in the wall places that I'm scared of, but I digress). One is strictly comfort food that I'm pretty sure is frozen then heated up in the kitchen and served as fresh. One other is supposed to be one of the nicer restaurants, but is very sometime-y -- I've had one of my best meals ever there, and I've also had some of my worst meals ever there -- after waiting forever to get it.

The other two are nicer caliber, and consistently serve good food. One is within walking distance of my house, so I usually end up there once a week for dinner.

That one in particular is what made me think about this question...Often the food that is served, while it's very good, isn't quite what's described on the menu: crab cakes served on mesclun greens instead of the described fresh spinach, or potato-crusted salmon on white rice when it's supposed to be basmati. Or once I got a turkey and peppered chevre panini with tomato and balsamic that was served ice cold, instead of pressed as described (I ate it...and then made sure the next time that I asked if it would be served hot this time, lol.)

But regardless of the restaurant, I never send anything back when it comes to these four...for various reasons. In the case of the nicer restaurants, it's nit-picky stuff, not really anything wrong with the food, so I'm not going to waste anyone's time complaining. In the case of the other two restaurants, I figure that I already have a low expectation going in, so at best they'll exceed it, at worst, they'll meet it, and I should have seen that coming and deserve whatever I'm served.

Even when it comes to larger chain restaurants, usually I'll only send something back if it's undercooked or tastes like it might be off (as in spoiled, like the lobster bisque I got not long ago that tasted as if the cream had gone completely wrong). If it just turns out to be prepared in a completely unexpected (even if badly unexpected) way, I chalk it up to my bad luck.

My mother drives me nuts sending stuff back because it's not what she expected when she ordered -- too spicy, too salty, too fried, whatever. I kind of have the mind set that you should just grin and bear it and remember the lesson for next time.

BUT...while I won't send back the food...if the server asks how I like it, then I will usually tell her simply and neutrally if something didn't work. I guess I think the kitchen has to hear it or they'll keep doing the same bizarre things.

[DoryD]

Originally Posted by KYHeirloomer

I'm wondering if geography doesn't play a role in all this.

I noticed, both in traveling and when I lived there, that Midwesterners are more reluctant to send something back (or even comment on it) than are people who live on the coasts.

Maybe I have a parochial view? Or maybe there's something to this?

Hmm...I read this and got to thinking that actually there is something to this. I'm probably a lot more mellow about sending food back (and about driving...and about being patient...and about a whole host of other things) since I moved to Maine than I was when I lived in the Washington, D.C. area. So probably there is something to be said for the difference between living in a more urban setting versus a more rural one.

Part of it might be that if, in the D.C. area, I sent my food book, they would actually do something about it: my food would be replaced, and the meal would be removed from the bill. Here, they *might* fix the food, and they never off to remove it from the bill -- so not really any point in refusing the food.

[DMT]

Originally Posted by teamfat

If she had said "We are out of prime rib, so we rolled this moose turd in broken glass and covered it with creosote - hope you like it." it probably would have ended the same.
mjb.

Excellent description!!!! (just needs a little A-1 to git 'er back ta raght...)

[KYHeirloomer]

For all those who do not send food back when it isn't prepared properly:

If you bought, say, a new computer, and it didn't work when you got home, would you return it? Or would you take a you-gotta-accept-what-you-get attitude?

If you purchase a first class ticket and the stewardess sits you in coach instead, would you stay there? Or would you insist on your first-class seat?

If you order a lavishly illustrated, coffee-table book, and are sent a bunch of photocopies stapled together in the middle, do you accept that as value recieved?

How are any of these things different than a badly prepared meal? Or one not cooked to order? Or different from what was on the menu?

[DMT]

There is little likelyhood of a "foriegn object" being injested from a faulty computer, incorrect seat, or poorly bound leaf of photocopies, should any of those examples be returned for "correction of deficiencies"...

[DoryD]

Originally Posted by DMT

There is little likelyhood of a "foriegn object" being injested from a faulty computer, incorrect seat, or poorly bound leaf of photocopies, should any of those examples be returned for "correction of deficiencies"...

Yes...I agree...while I see your point KYH, this point is more powerful for me, LOL.

(And again I go back to what is my expectation for the restaurant -- will it *really* be better when I get the food back, or is this as good as it gets for this particular restaurant?)

[indianwells]

Must admit that unless it's cold, or off I usually put it down to experience. The place will NEVER get another chance however, and I won't be shy about telling anyone at every opportunity.
I understand that any place can have an off day but if you ask for a steak med-rare and it comes well done then that is basics and any chef who can't get a steak (approximately) right ain't getting my patronage!

[Dangel]

The very last time that I sent anything back was in a very popular privately owned restaurant. The bluefish was available broiled or cajun style. Not wanting to take a chance on their interpretation of "cajun" I opted for broiled and was served bluefish cajun style. Tried to be a sport and eat the blackened mess in front of me but I really didn't like it. I received the "correct" version as everyone else at the table finished their meal. I quickly ate about 1/2 of it because we had plans and I wasn't about to hold us up. My all night race for the john began about 1 1/2 hours later. Lesson learned.

[abbey]

As a customer, it's your right to complain and ask whatever you want to ask. You're paying for the food and you obviously want what's worth of your money. Advertising can really be misleading. Shame on them.

[cooka]

I really think that when chef's/cooks design a menu and use classical terms or similar
terms like "French Style" the food should be cooked to what is says
At the same time The person who cooked the dish might have been taught from a chef /cook or who ever doesn't really have a clue regarding definitions of certain terms so that person really has not been really educated properley in the first place .
I would have sent it back and explained that this is not what you expected as the wording (french stlye) was used and was not cooked accordingly but happy to explain what and how it should have been done If the cook has no interest in accepting so he/she should not be cooking .i am a bit harsh but if the person cooking happily takes on board the information you should let it be and on return another day etc just drop in and if still on the menu and comes out proper like it was stated ,you need to say thanks lol but if not go somewhere else to eat
eating food is an experience that should be enjoyed to the max not a bad one just because you just wanted a hot meal is no excuse to eat something that is not right it leaves a bad taste and after working a long hard week as we all know that thats every week is like that we should accept only the best i think anyway sorry for raving on and for my grammer etc

[lentil]

For me, it comes down to the fact that I'm paying and I should get what was advertised or what I ordered. There's no need to be mean about it, but simply stating that the food is not prepared as ordered, is off, or whatever is the responsibility of the consumer. Why on earth would anyone lie down and get walked over AND pay for it?

On a related topic, there's a miserable woman who works in the deli of the local grocery. She is absolutely horrible to everyone! People stand there and give eachother surprised looks, but no one calls her on her behavior. Early one day last week, I had to run out of the shop to grab something we had run out of which I hate to do, both for the $$ and the aggravation factors. This woman was putting things out in the open fridges near the deli and completely ignored me. I leaned back and asked her nicely if she was the person for behind the deli counter, not knowing if I should ring the bell for someone out back. She snarled that she was but was busy putting out the hummus, wasn't she? I said thank you and I'll gladly to to the other grocery store. She almost fell over herself getting behind the deli , but I had already walked away. She chased me, beet red, asking me what I wanted, how she could help me, how she was just kidding. I ordered my ham and said thank you. I really don't think anyone stands up to her but just takes her abuse as part of the friendly service at our local Hannaford.

Again, I'm not paying to get walked on and would NEVER treat or allow anyone who works for me to treat customers with such meanness and disrespect. We all know it can be phony, but that's the nature of the service industry.

[RPMcMurphy]

I rarely send food back. Then again, i'm not that picky....I chalk it up as a bad experience.

maybe MAYBE ill send a steak back that hasn't been cooked the was I asked...but usually not unless its a reputable steakhouse.

I don't expect much from most places I guess...

[bbay]

same page as RPM.
i don't send food back.
if i ordered a steak at, say, medium and it was served at either rare or well, then i'd send it back. that's a big enough mistake to warrant sending it back, IMHO.
in most cases i'd give the kitchen the benefit of the doubt and try it again later. we all have our 'off' nights... or even 'off' tickets. i understand.

if i was spending a good chunk of change ($15) at a restaurant that served me 'scrambled eggs with vegetables and meat mixed in the scramble' when i was paying for 'a delicately-turned omlet with warmed fillings', i'd just chalk it up to experience and not return to that place.

i'm sure there are people more vocal than i am, who would step up and call them out on it, but i think that it's important to know that there are people like ME out there who will NOT complain about service/food. people who will simply remove that restaurant from future considerations...

that's just how i eat. a lot of people will be more vocal. only, know that there are people with opinions who don't feel that it is necessary to waste their mouth on your cold food/ bad service, et al...

if my ravioli was cold and you took it back and microwaved it, i will know because the raviolis will be glued to each other and ruined.

a microwave will not save a cold dish.

that's just me and maybe a few others...

[deltadoc]

Originally Posted by KYHeirloomer

For all those who do not send food back when it isn't prepared properly:

If you bought, say, a new computer, and it didn't work when you got home, would you return it? Or would you take a you-gotta-accept-what-you-get attitude?

If you purchase a first class ticket and the stewardess sits you in coach instead, would you stay there? Or would you insist on your first-class seat?

If you order a lavishly illustrated, coffee-table book, and are sent a bunch of photocopies stapled together in the middle, do you accept that as value recieved?

How are any of these things different than a badly prepared meal? Or one not cooked to order? Or different from what was on the menu?

Yes, none of those are meant for consumption. I worked in a restaurant and saw what the cook did to cheeseburgers that got sent back (usually every Friday night from the same customer). Talk about "chef's surprise". Ugh!

doc