[Alisha]

Ok, i need a little help... I have to write a speech in school for entertainment, but it can't be a personal experiance... i wanted to do all the crazy, funny stuff that you see in restaurants. anything from conversations and policies, to order requests and people.. it can be anything... it just can't be MY personal experiance... if anyone wouldn't mind sharing a few things, i would greatly appreciate it... no names required... Thanks

[pgr555]

Take a look at the other thread that is going right now "1st signs of a bad..." but I would ask the poster if they mind you using their experience before you do.
pgr

[Headless Chicken]

Read Tony Bourdain's Kitchen Confidential. Lots of that in there.

Then theres all the old tricks like during rush, having a chef yelling at the new guy for a gallon of steam, a lobster gun, scrambled eggs without breaking the yolks, or filling a vinyl glove with some watered down ketchup then pretending to cut your finger and squirting the mock blood at someone...then watch them faint

I once got really frustrated with people asking me the phone# to our upstairs serving area so after the 50th time, I responded with 967-11-11 (the phone# for Pizza Pizza delivery)!!! Yes, they dialed it but only realized it just as they were dialing.

My previous director was gay and loved it. Every other day, he would come up to me and point out some guy in the crowd and say "Oh God, he is so cute/hot. That butt of his, I could just..." then I'd try to tune the rest. I got a little fed up 1 day so when he asked for a sausage for lunch (he meant it to be in a sandwich but never said so), I took the biggest debrazzini, wrapped it with plastic wrap, and dropped it on his desk with a packet of mayo and said "have fun!"

In baking, we "accidentally" made penis shaped éclairs. One guy overfilled 1 with cream and took it to a chick in another baking lab. She bit into it and got a face full of whipped cream. She also happened to be 1 of those girls who was very well known to all the guys in the program.

[Cat Man]

My favorite gimmicks during opening night, was to have the busboy empty the water out of the coffee machine (It was hard plumbed!)

After that, he was told to get some product out of the basement on the fly (There was no basement, but there was a locked door to the water heater, and all the management knew if someone ran up in a hurry and needed the 'key to the basement asap, that they had given the key to another manager)

Rotating the ice in the ice machine....fresh ice goes to the bottom, bottom ice to the top

A dessert for the foh staff, but not ice cream, lard or tallow.

and finally, the poor hostess who's job it was to feed the fish in the retention pond out front, where no fish resided, but she was told how important this responsibiity was because that's where we got all our fresh fish, and if she didn't feed them enough, they would die and we would run out of fish

Cat Man

[DMT]

Sort of a long intro...

My sister decided that her second marriage should be "special", hence a Vegas wedding...

Dad knew of a restaurant that other family members had an investment in, so the wedding party (about twelve of us) went there.

Word got out to the staff that "family" was in the "banquet room", and the whole bunch of them were a little on edge during service.

Don't want to look bad to "the Family" now do they???

Anyway, this poor busboy was on pins and needles (I think it was his first night or week in the joint) and was shaking and quaking throughout the first part of the evening...

One of his jobs was to fill the water glasses, and as he went to fill one near me, the ice jam in the pitcher popped loose, spilling water and cubes all over the place.

He was mortified, and shrinking visibly by the second as the magnitude of his gaffe sunk in.

Poor basttid...

Shouldn't have done that with the owner's family in the house...

Dad was scowling.

Mom was all aghast with her napking drawn up to her mouth.

And me? I stood up and shouted, "Come on SEVEN!!!" as the cubes settled down on the table...

(we're in Vegas, remember??)

The ice was broken (so to speak). Dad loosened up, Mom relaxed, and some of the rest of the wedding party stood up and hollered, too.

Glad to report that the rest of the evening service went well, once the staff realized that we weren't as "stuffy" as intially presumed.

You see, our little branch of the family tree was/is a lot less concerned with "impressions" as the ones that had a financial stake in that restaurant.

We liked to have fun, if even at our own expense.

Oh, and the tip was not on the meager side, either...