Hi Kate! I highly suggest you check out www.ultimatewedding.com
(it's free)if you have not already. you can find lots of answers to your general questions there. My wedding would not have been the absolute perfect day it was without the advice of the ladies on that message board (not to say I don't love the folks here!)
My own advice- don't even think of cooking for your own wedding. My husband and I, both professional chefs, did that at the country club my husband worked at at the time, it turned into a media frenzy and hovering and (trying to be) helpful out of town relatives. It turned out fabulous, we saved a ton of money, but the stress- oh, honey, I would have never done that if I had known.
Good Luck and keep us updated!