i agree, don't bother eating at fisherman's wharf. it's pretty much a touristy place with ok food. if you must eat down there, go to Scoma's
(it's as orginal as it get down there). or there's a Hooter's across the street.
if you want ocean view dining, i'd reccomend the The Beach Chalet
, for lunch. it overlooks the pacific at Ocean Beach. i say go for lunch because if you go for dinner there's a good chance the fog will roll in and you won't be able to see the beach across the street, much less the ocean.
there's also the Moss Beach Distillery. it's about a 40 minute drive south of the city, down HWY 1, but you should get a nice sunset view of the ocean as you dine. but i've never eaten any of the food.
in Napa, i highly highly highly (yes 3 times) suggest you have dinner at Greystone
it's the CIA's working restuarant. i suggest you make reservation and try to get there about an hour early so you can have a drink outside overlooking the terraced garden where they grow their own produce that you will be served for dinner. it's simply outstanding!!!
Abalone, i can't help you with that one. maybe ask the guys from HOg Island Oyster Farm. they will be at the farmers market saturday morning serving local bivalve varietals.
another great restaurant find in SF is Delfina
. it's a small husband/wife owned restaurant that is quite creative with the menu and use all local ingredients