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Quotes That Make You Go Hmmm . . .

post #1 of 28
Thread Starter 
:D QUOTATION: Murder is commoner among cooks than among members of any other profession.
W.H. Auden, Forewords and Afterwords Random House 73

Sorry, but I ran across this and couldn't resist!
más vale tarde que nunca
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más vale tarde que nunca
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post #2 of 28

But on the other hand.....

Robert Burton
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***It is better to ask forgiveness than beg permission.***
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Moderator Emerita, Welcome Forum
***It is better to ask forgiveness than beg permission.***
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post #3 of 28
"Aus alte Pfannen lernt Man kochen".... One learns to cook out of old pans.....
...."This whole reality thing is really not what I expected it would be"......
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...."This whole reality thing is really not what I expected it would be"......
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post #4 of 28
"Never cook for someone who's name hangs over the door" -Kitchen Confidential

I used to wonder why Anthony Bourdain said this and I found out about a year ago. The owner told me to hit the bricks after only three months. He hireed me back and now we are good friends, I think because now I understand that it's his way or the highway. He pays me better than anyone in my city and his food rocks, but he has rules and ways that can only be learned under his tutelage.
post #5 of 28
"God creates meat, the devil creates cooks."

-Unknown

Invention, my dear friends, is ninety-three percent perspiration, six percent electricity, four percent evaporation, and two percent butterscotch ripple

My Author Page

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Invention, my dear friends, is ninety-three percent perspiration, six percent electricity, four percent evaporation, and two percent butterscotch ripple

My Author Page

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post #6 of 28
"You eat a bushel of dirt in your life without knowing, so what's a little extra?"

---- My grandmother, Bessie Rich
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Moderator Emerita, Welcome Forum
***It is better to ask forgiveness than beg permission.***
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post #7 of 28
Speaking of Mothers, my Mom's favorite one regarding leftovers was:

"It needs to be eaten"
...."This whole reality thing is really not what I expected it would be"......
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...."This whole reality thing is really not what I expected it would be"......
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post #8 of 28
"God created the world in six days, on the seventh day he rested, that night the devil snuck in and made the cook."

Andrew
My life, my choice.....
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My life, my choice.....
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post #9 of 28
"it only takes one bean to make a cassolette"
"Laissez Le Bon Temps Roule"
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"Laissez Le Bon Temps Roule"
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post #10 of 28
"Everytime you eat a Big Mac, God kills a kitten!"- Morgan Spurlock





Ok, not really:D
post #11 of 28
Yes, but he should.
My life, my choice.....
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My life, my choice.....
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post #12 of 28
" A good cook takes what is dead and gives it a respectful burial "

-Me, Today-




And cats deserve what they get...................The 10th one should have been the first one.
http://www.frappr.com/chefsunited
One time a guy pulled a knife on me. I could tell it wasn't a professional job; it had butter on it.- Rodney Dangerfield -


'We're ALL amateurs; It's just that some of us are more professional about it than others'. - George Carlin
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http://www.frappr.com/chefsunited
One time a guy pulled a knife on me. I could tell it wasn't a professional job; it had butter on it.- Rodney Dangerfield -


'We're ALL amateurs; It's just that some of us are more professional about it than others'. - George Carlin
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post #13 of 28
"Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are?" Brillat Savrin. Don't think I spelled that right.
post #14 of 28
OK, not cooking related but I love George Carlin when he rants on...

"If your looking for "Self Help", why would you read a book written by someone else?!?!...Thats not "Self Help"...Thats "HELP"...Theres no such thing as self help...You did it youself, You didn't need help!"

George Carlin-Complaints and Grievances
post #15 of 28
"Salt is good; but if the salt becomes unsalty, with what will you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with one another." Mark 9:50
Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death! Auntie Mame
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Life is a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death! Auntie Mame
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post #16 of 28
"BEST IF PURCHASED BY SEPT 31" , My wife, yesterday, as she pointed to this on a package while we were in Kroeger's bread aisle.
post #17 of 28
My mom's favorite saying - what you have left on your plate will feed a family of 5 in India! - now finish your food:lol:
What is patriotism but the love of the food one ate as a child? ~Lin Yutang
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What is patriotism but the love of the food one ate as a child? ~Lin Yutang
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post #18 of 28
or when I was a kid...."eat your food, there are poor starving children in China".....um ok, I'll package it up and you can send it mom.

"one of the hardest realizations I've come to is that the kitchen is at the mercy of the waitstaff......food can be great but if service is not people will not come back, if food is mediocre or better and service is great guests will come back."
shroom...lightening bolt a couple of years ago......
cooking with all your senses.....
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cooking with all your senses.....
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post #19 of 28
Great food is like great sex. The more you have the more you want. ~Gael Greene
Keep those fires burnin'
 
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Keep those fires burnin'
 
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post #20 of 28
"Donuts: is there anything they can't do?"

"I dream of meatball sandwiches. All you can eat. Two bucks."

"You don't win friends with salad."

Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

"Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!"

"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get."

Ah, The Simpsons. The world would be a much worse place without them.

Kevin

Fore
post #21 of 28
"Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It ain't over 'til you both get your cookies..."
(can't remember who or when, but sage advice...)
I might be suffering from CDO.
It is just like OCD, except the letters are in alphabetical order.
Just as they should be...
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I might be suffering from CDO.
It is just like OCD, except the letters are in alphabetical order.
Just as they should be...
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post #22 of 28
Never trust a dog to watch your food,
"Patrick Aged 10 from advice from kids"

I cook with wine, sometimes i even add it to the food

Ive been on a diet for two weeks, and all ive lost is two weeks

I'm on the malt whisky diet. Ive lost three days already

I read cook books like i read science fiction. i get to the end and think, that'll never happen.

I have loads of these infact i start every page of my menu with on, i would appreciate any more you guys might have.
post #23 of 28
"If you're peeling an onion, and the next layer looks like shoe leather, you might as well keep on peeling, because no amount of cooking is going to fix that."

Julia Child
post #24 of 28
My dear daughter 4 years ago... "You git whatcha git and ya don't throw a fit".

To remind her of this each and every meal we all sit down to? It's become a purpose if not an obsession in life.

Then there's the next of my all time personal favorites.

"Cheap food ain't good and good food ain't cheap but.... It"s always worth the wait!" ;)
Heard and read this somehwere's at a festival in Livingston County, NY.

And then....
"Gotta Love it!!!!" Dave Burghaus, TGI Fridays, circa 1984

How about.... "Real food has a shelf life not a half life".
post #25 of 28
Looks only last a while, cooking lasts forever.
Fluctuat nec mergitur
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Fluctuat nec mergitur
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post #26 of 28
according to a plaque (present) in my kitchen, "one should never trust a skinny cook."... Cant say i ever met one i liked either
"If we're not supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?" Jo Brand
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"If we're not supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?" Jo Brand
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post #27 of 28
OMG, I just remembered the plaque (also a present) in my kitchen...

There are fast cooks
There are slow cooks
This kitchen belongs to a half-fast cook. :crazy:
post #28 of 28
The thriftiest man pays the most ....
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