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What was your best-ever excuse…

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 
...true or not, for being late or absent at your job? :look:
Vera
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Vera
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post #2 of 12
My twins were born on a weekend. They couldn't have planned it better. I'm the dad. On a Sunday afternoon at 1:00 wife said she was ready to go to the hospital. The twins were born 10 minutes on either side of 3 PM. I had told my boss it would be happening soon, so when I took Monday and Tuesday off, there wasn't a problem. I was as happy and proud as a man could ever be. :bounce::bounce::bounce: I got pink and blue hospital bracelets, since one was a girl and one was a boy.
post #3 of 12
I'll speak only of the excuses I've received.

Once had a dishwasher show up at the employee entrance 10 minutes before his shift with another person in tow.
The stranger did all of the talking, stating how he was the dishwasher's lifelong friend who was in town for a short period, and wanted to know if he could get out of working that night.
I told him that I was sorry, it was too close to the beginning of his shift, and too late to find a replacement.
They seemed to accept that, the friend left, and the dishwasher clocked in and started working.
About an hour into his shift I received a phone call.
They said they were a friend of the dishwasher's, that he was with them, that their car broke down out of town, so he wouldn't be in for his dish shift.
I asked them if that was true, could they explain why he was here doing dishes for the last hour.
Click.
He had set up an alibi and never canceled it.

I once had a dishwasher call in and say he couldn't work because he couldn't find his shoes.
Long story short, I told the morning dishwasher the story, and said he'd have to stay, unless he wouldn't mind loaning the guy his shoes.
Of course he agreed.
I told the call in to show up, we had some shoes we could loan him.
He showed up in some ugly green converse high tops.
I said "I thought you couldn't find your shoes?"
"Oh, these were some other ones".
He was not a happy camper.
(I always pictured he and his friends sitting around and getting stoned, and him trying to think up a good excuse to call in. "Tell them you can't find your shoes dude! They can't make you work without shoes!")

Similar situation:
Had a dishwasher call in, stating he couldn't work because he couldn't find his shirt.
I told him he could wear the A.M. dishwashers shirt, come on in.
He showed up and wore the shirt the first guy got all smelly and sweaty.
He never forgot his shirt again though.

This one comes from a friend:
He had a cook on an On-Call position.
Someone called in, so he gave the guy a call.
His room-mate answered, was told the situation, and responded "Oh, he's asleep in the tree out back, and it's too far for me to walk to go wake him. When he wakes up and comes in from the tree I'll give him the message".
That's so wierd it would have to be true, wouldn't it?
:roll:
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
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Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
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post #4 of 12
Pretty typical when I was in Alaska to get someone calling in from jail. 9 times out of 10 though when they got out they would show up for their shift! :D
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My latest musical venture!
http://myspace.com/nikandtheniceguys
 
Also
http://www.myspace.com/popshowband "I'm at the age when food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table." Rodney Dangerfield RIP
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post #5 of 12
my father has a pretty big 5 bay - shop/garage/franchise in a rough part of a major city...

he gets good ones...

calling from jail
calling in "drunk" (yep...I'm drunk i can't come in)
wife died (3 times? of cancer?)

the jail and drunk are most popular....the dying has since died down after dad started requesting and calling funeral homes.
post #6 of 12
i uhhhh i once told them my aunt got into an acident.........horrible i know, must have been something amazing going on that day.


what a bastard i am......

I worked where a dishwasher called in and said he cut his finger off the night before and couldnt come in, low and behold he came in after he got bitched out by the chef and had a paper cut...................true story.
"Some of us Cook. Some of us Grow. All of us Eat."
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"Some of us Cook. Some of us Grow. All of us Eat."
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post #7 of 12
I had a cook call in to say she couldn't work because she'd just gotten her belly button pierced and it hurt so bad that she couldn't button her pants over it.

I told her to put on a dress, take two aspirin and show up in 15 minutes.
She did, but I think she took something other than aspirin....something more like morphine, I think. She was useless, so I sent her home anyway before she did more damage to herself or someone else.

I also had someone call in "Dead"....."Grateful", that is.
The Dead were playing the previous night and that particular cook had tickets for the show for which I switched his night shift for a day. Obviously, that free spirit became even freer during the concert ingesting "who-knows-what" to the point where he was completely unable to show up for his night shift the next day. Again, I advised him to take two aspirin, drink a glass of water and show up in 15 if he gave a ____ about keeping a job. He showed up trailing a cloud of patchouli and slogged through his shift, though not particularly effectively.:crazy:

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Liquored up and laquered down,
She's got the biggest hair in town!

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www.foodandphoto.com

Liquored up and laquered down,
She's got the biggest hair in town!

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post #8 of 12
I have never been late to work.
post #9 of 12
A train was stalled on the tracks, and no matter how I tried to get around it, the darn thing was so long that I couldn't find a fast alternate route. I got in 15 minutes late, a rarity for someone who's always, always early.
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***It is better to ask forgiveness than beg permission.***
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post #10 of 12
i used to HAVE to call in to work late 1-2 times a year in december when someone would jump out in front of my NJ Transit train I took to NYC everyday....took at least 1.5 hours to "investigate" and change conductors.

want to talk about inconsiderate commuters? you should hear them on a crowded train late for work...
post #11 of 12
Had a thrombosed hemorrhoid burst on me once. Didn't know what it was. Scared the xxit out of me, which, of course, made the problem worse.

They accepted the excuse without asking for more details!

doc
post #12 of 12
I had one of the junior techs call in at the casino. He claimed he was sick and couldn't come in. Two hours later I get a call from the dept head asking why the youngster wasn't working. I asked how he knew and he said the idiot youngster had hit and totaled his car. The youngsters excuse? I was getting some soup, with 6 friends in the car :lol:
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