Former boss badmouthing me... not sure what (if anything) to do...

Leeniek,

I'm sorry to hear you are having such a problem with your old boss. As for why they are badmouthing you, my guess can only be something to the affect that they don't want to look bad by admitting to having made a mistake, and are doing whatever possible to make it look like YOUR fault.

My husband and I worked in a hotel for a woman where we lived on site. We worked 24/7 for this woman for a year straight. No days off. Literally 24/7. She then decided that for some reason, we were stealing from her. Then someone told her I called her a "stupid b***h". Which I never did (at least not to anyone other then my husband - because, well, she was!). So her emotions got the better of  her, and she fired us and tried to kick us out of our apartment all in one day, which she legally could not do (we were residents, and she would have to go through the standard eviction process). She swore up and down that we stole from her. We never did and she had no proof. She fought our unemployment claiming we stole. With no proof, we were granted the unemployment. It took us almost 3 months, but we got it. Now we're in the process of suing her for wrongful termination. 

This happened almost a year ago, and recently I heard from someone that she still, to this day, claims we were horrible stealing people who did nothing but lie, cheat, and rob her. When really, she let her emotions get the best of her and fired us, because someone 'claimed' I called her a name. She made a bad business decision based on emotions, and is trying to save face. 

I'm not sure if this old boss of yours did something similar, but it sounds like it to me. Thankfully we ended up moving 1000 miles away, so I don't ever have to worry about this old boss of mine ever again. I'm also not sure of the laws in your area, but I would call a labor department or whatever the equal there and ask them about the money/information owed to you. They will be your best source of information. 

Good luck! (Sorry this was a lot longer then I intended!)

Don't worry about her bad mouthing you, it only shows on her not you. A wise man once told me not to get into a heated exchange with an idiot, they will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Leeniek, this is unfortunate. Not much you can do about her bad-mouthing you (well, you could sue for defamation of character - good luck with that one!), but as far as your ROE goes, I would contact your labor relations board (Don't know how this works in Ontario, but I'm sure it's the same as BC) They are usually more inclined to help the employee than the employer (IMO). Yes, you are entitled to your ROE within four business days if you QUIT, 48 hours if you are terminated. As far as your overtime goes, if you are on salary, you should keep an overtime bank which the employer is supposed to sign off on, and you should get paid out or get paid time off. Problem is, most places work on the honor system - which always works in favour of the employer - and they don't track overtime officially. Been there...

If it's any consolation, any good manager will take any sort of gossip about a prospective employee with a grain of salt. There are always two sides to a story, and you never know the moivation behind someone's comments, good or bad - again, been there...

Good luck!

I'm going to play devil's advocate.

1) She's got a legitimate reason to be angry. Making a bad hire sucks and it costs much money and time.

2) If you're getting panic attacks from work, I think it's a safe bet that your performance is suffering.

3) The key thing.

On the whole, I'd not be too bothered by it. You weren't at that job long enough to put it on your CV so the chances that prospective employers will hear from her are small. And as they say, blood will out.

It doesn't matter what your old boss says about you, it matters what you say about you. You walk the life you live, that person didn't know you long enough to comment........Don't let them drag you down to their level..............your Buddy................ChefBillyB

She is the stupid one . If you were this and that and could not cook, why would she have let you stay there as long as you did?  Just say to people''whatever she says that coming from her you deem a compliment as she talks worse about other employees, ignorance is bliss.. Realy not much you can do except if someone calls for reference(another employer) and she bad mouths you and you can prove it. You can then sue her for libel and whatever else you can think of. On a reference all she can say is how long you were there, and if she would or would not rehire you and thats it. She can''t go into explanations by law.  You are partially covered under HIPPA laws.

Leeniek,

Do you know a "friendly lawyer" (I know, I KNOW, that is an oxymoron!)?

If you do, perhaps they would write a "cease and desist letter" to your previous employer, that might settle things down.

Unless she owes you a ton of dough, I would walk away and chalk it up to a learning experience. People like that are poison. The business as you know is stressful enough without dealing with that kind of personalities. Not to mention, now you're taking it home.. close the door behind you and leave it there.

As others have said, there is no need to use her as a reference per se. You can always put a fellow employee as a reference. MOST employers want someone that can work and play with others. Someone that worked elbow to elbow with you would know your daily work ethics more so than the shrew walking through the kitchen on the occassional tirade.

Sadly, her behaviour isn't uncommon either. There are quite a few crazy people in this industry and there are days when I'm sure most all of us feel like 'asshole magnets'

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChefBillyB 

It doesn't matter what your old boss says about you, it matters what you say about you.

Yep.

If it really bothers you, grab one of the cooks who told you that she was bad mouthing you and drop in on her for a friendly visit.

All you really have to say is, "I just want this to stop", and walk out.

Maybe she'll catch on, maybe she won't.. 

/shrug

Life's too short.

Let it go.

Move on.

Does this person deserve the level of attention you're giving her?

Is she real enough of a person to warrant the level of attention you're giving her?

Do you really want to exert your energy on this?

It's over.

F*** her and everything she stands for, but

stop wasting time on this.

And I mean that in a caring/helpful way, not in a jerk way.

Amen..

Not to mention the fact that if the store is going through cooks like water.. other places aren't stupid.. they see the trend, they hear the rumors.. MOST are smart enough to realize that it can't be ALL of her former employees that are the problem. Small world this cooking business

Everyone is right tho, for the short amount of time you were there, I wouldn't wast the air time explaining to anyone on interviews. If you're asked where the time went.. just say you took some time off for personal reasons and move on.

Quote:

Originally Posted by leeniek 

For sure this business is a small world.

Veritably.

And it works both ways.  Last place I left after 5 years, everyone wanted to know deep, dark, dirty secrets and were expecting me to talk trash.

Really?  This place carried me for a long time and became a family to me, and because I quit I'm expected to sh*t talk?

No.

People with integrity will see through the BS/sh*t talk.

It's incestuous, the business; everyone should watch their tongues in a community.

It'll come back to haunt you someday.

p.s. good luck and godspeed in your current endeavors.  hope that leaving the place didn't hit your pocket too hard.