Now fast is too fast?

There are a number of factors here

 

The culture that the woman comes from and how 'traditional' that culture might be.

Is there a language barrier?

Two months plus a 3 day visit?  Hmmmmmm.  Would you seriously consider a permanent relationship with someone you had met in 'real' life after a 3 day face-to-face relationship?

 

If you did make the relationship permanent:

 

Would she be able to find work - and more importantly, would her visa allow her to do so?

Does she have a reasonable command of the language?

Would her skills set make her employable in a time of global recession?

 

Whilst I know of three, very happy, successful relationships which started via the internet - I also know of many that haven't worked out in 'real' life.  However, the only person who can answer your questions is YOU! 

I met my wife via the web., but then again I was a lot older then you.. DO NOT RUSH INTO ANYTHING you have plenty of time and believe me as you grow older you grow wiser and smarter. Its pretty easy to say I Do  but very hard and expensive  to say I Don;t.  When I was younger I made an error in judgement and it wound up in divorce. I was to yong and stupid to know what signs to look out for. Plus being in restaurant business did not help, as it is very consuming.

The only advise I can give is take your time there is no need to be in a hurry ( despite what your girlfriends mother wishes/thinks), My wife is from another country as well and to be honest my wife and I met and was married within 6 months (less than that actually) and that was 15 years ago ... but we were also separated about a year and a half just months after we were married due to her being home sick, mother getting hurt and dealing with INS which can be a nightmare. And being married makes no difference with INS, you still have to go through the paperwork and that takes time (the year and a half that we were separated was mainly due to INS paperwork)

 

The main thing is to take your time and get to know each other, you guys if your anything like my wife and I have a huge difference in your cultural back ground so learn about her culture and get her to learn about yours and get to know each others family (VERY IMPORTANT) and what her plans for the future are.

 

Good luck in your future and keep us posted.

Sorry, Headless.  Anything to do with cooking, I'm all over it.  Personal relationships--for me, anyways--are personal.

 

O.T.O.H. I can offer some advice about visiting her family in Winnipeg.  Look, they don't call it "Winter-pig" for nothing.  If you're going to vist, make sure it's before the end of October, no later than that.

 

Yeah, yeah, it gets cold in Tororonto, and it snows a lot, and I know you know how to drive in winter conditions.  Winterpig is COLD, like minus 30 C cold in the winter.  But I wouldn't know, I've neve been there.  Then again, I spent 16 winters in Saskatoon......

Mary Astor (the femme fatale from the Maltese Falcon) said, Once you start asking questions, innocence is gone. She was right too.

Sexual mores aren't absolute, they're products of culture. For the last fifty years or so, it can't be said that North American adults touching tongues on the first kiss is rushing -- if desire is there. It's an expression of frank sexuality, which -- if you're also attracted -- should come as a pleasant surprise. Frank is so much better than coy. Your friend sounds bold and delightful.

Relax, enjoy, follow her lead, trust her timing, blow in her ear, and make out like a bandit. I promise you, you won't get pregnant. If you're worried about guarding her feelings, show her a little more trust and respect. It's pretty clear she knows her own mind. For your part, butch up and quit being such a fleur. Don't feel shame. Don't feel obligation. Those aren't her terms, so don't add them.

Take off your shoes, drink champagne you can barely afford, draw the shades, turn out the lights, light candles. Slow dance in your living room while your shadows dance with you. Get drunk on the smell of her hair. Cook her favorite foods. Paint her toenails. Go shopping, buy her earrings (but not a ring), and be happy.

Don't worry so much about falling in love "too soon," you're a western adult, not a child-virgin in a remote Asian village. The experience of falling in love is a necessary and important part of growing up. The miserable heartache of falling out of love is too. Anyway, there's no such thing as the right time, only the right person.

Quit being a schmuck. You'll learn too soon that you regret the things you haven't done far more than the things you have. You only get one shot at youth, bub. Grab it with both hands.

BDL
Edited by boar_d_laze - 9/28/11 at 2:34pm