I seem to be getting a lot of these lately, both via e-mail and phone calls:
I am Abdullah Jones, Crown Prince of Nigeria, I am Jane Smith, sales Representative of Poop-on discounts and deal-of-the-week, I am about to make you an offer you can't refuse.
You will be allowed to service my customer base! Of course, for this privilege, you must give a 50% discount on your goods/services to my customers, and from the remaining 50%, I might give you--if I feel generous that day- a whopping 25% back. Make no mistake, these are MY customers--that is, they pay me money, you provide them the goods, and I give you some pennies. You are NOT allowed any customer information from my data base, you are only a third party.
Hopefully you have not heard the viscous rumours that Poop-on needs you more than you need Poop-on.These are outrageous, untrue and wrongful lies! Nothing could be further from the truth! It's just that our marketing techniques are too overwhelming for your simple minds, and explaining them to you would crush your fragile, eggshell heads. So don't ask how our superior marketing will do wonders for your business. However, if you should make any kind of money in the future, Poop-on will take all the credit for this---it has nothing to do with your goods or services.
So, now that I have taken my precious time to patiently explain this marketing scam technique, you are indebted to Poop-on and will take our services. Your Visa#, banking information, and first child are required now before we can proceed.
Apfelmus-Tortenguss Orgasmus, Ceo and Coo of the First Nigerian Savings & Loan
Jane Smith, Poop-on Discounts and deal-of-the-week.
How 'bout you guys?