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Kitchen languages!

post #1 of 15
6/1/12 at 10:24am
Thread Starter 

Not sure where everyone's from, but in my experience I've heard a lot of phrases that I've had to laugh about...some I've actually had to google, then laugh about.  Busting out my character map for grammar purposes here.

 

"Putain! PUTAIN DE + <an unintelligible long string of words no one could possibly understand>" 

- I personally love this one.  You throw "putain de" in front of any noun and people know you're serious.

 

"Porco DIO!"

- This was something you could hear from the kitchen regularly when I was younger.  It was normally followed by "non cappice n'a cazze." and someone getting bitchslapped.

 

What else do you people have?  Any stories? 

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post #2 of 15
6/1/12 at 3:54pm

Calling  God a pig (Italian) and someone a prostitute (French)..........ummmmmmmmm

 

Petals.

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post #3 of 15
6/1/12 at 7:49pm

what gets said in the kitchen stays in the kitchen... and for good reason....

----

 


"Plus, this method makes you look like a complete lunatic. If you care about that sort of thing".  - Dave Arnold

 

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post #4 of 15
6/2/12 at 6:00am
Thread Starter 

Hahaha.  I'm not saying these were the most reputable places I've ever worked for, however the majority of my french slang as well as my italian came from the chefs that'd drop those phrases faster then they'd season a steak.  Not trying to offend anyone or anything.

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post #5 of 15
6/2/12 at 7:07am

Nothing i didn;t hear worse of at home from my mother's, shall we say, colorful and essentially sacrilegious Tuscan swearing.  She usually spoke English but her swearing knew no language boundaries.  And nobody can beat the Tuscans.

"Siduri said, 'Gilgamesh, where are you roaming? You will never find the eternal life that you seek...Savour your food, make each of your days a delight, ... let music and dancing fill your house, love the child who holds you by the hand and give your wife pleasure in your embrace.'"
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post #6 of 15
6/3/12 at 9:46am

Classy.

I can think of plenty of things not worth repeating but why go there with such a lovely tongue as French or Italian.

When my wife brings my morning coffee...

 

 "Sei caduta dal cielo perché assomigli ad un angelo?"

 

 

Dave

I think the most wonderful thing in the world is another chef. I'm always excited about learning new things about food.
Paul Prudhomme
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post #7 of 15
6/3/12 at 5:05pm

Smooth.....thumb.gif

 

Petals.

Petals
Réalisé avec un soupçon d'amour.

Baby Cake
(4 photos)
Fruitcake - decorated
(5 photos)
Victorian cupcakes
(10 photos)
Reply
post #8 of 15
6/11/12 at 11:21am

I love sending a new server to look for the bacon stretcher for me when I'm super busy.  Once I had a bartender that was dumber than a box of rocks, one night I asked her to get the bananna peerler from the bar for me......after about 15 minutes she came back in the kitchen and said...I swear to God "Ummm I can't find the bannana peeler,.......couldn't you just use your hands?"

Anyone else have mythical appliances they send people for?  I don't know why but this prank really makes me smile. 

Nicknames:

   Bubble Dancer.....Dishwasher(no disrespect to the life blood of the industry but I frikking love this nickname)

Anyone else have good nicknames?

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post #9 of 15
6/11/12 at 12:54pm

broiler stretcher , left handed monkey wrench , buckets of steam , chicken lips . My personal fave is to get someone to chop flour and please use 2 knives to be done quicker.

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post #10 of 15
6/11/12 at 3:33pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MichaelGA View Post

what gets said in the kitchen stays in the kitchen... and for good reason....

LOL!  Yeah, my wife used to refer to it as kitchen mouth.

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post #11 of 15
6/11/12 at 6:52pm
Thread Starter 

Dishwasher:  Pot Monkey, Pearl Diver, Sultan of Suds, Dishpan Sam,  Bubble Baby

Pantry: Salad Tosser, 

Saute Cook: Pan Jockey, Pan tosser, Jumper

Fry Cook (if it's just fry): Bitch.

Broiler: Flame Warden, Flame Wrangler, Flamer, Firefighter

Sous Chef: #1, Riker, Leche-cul

911/restock/backup guy: Hopper

Prep: Scapegoat, Carpenter, bitch.

CDC: YES CHEF

EC: YES SIR, CHEF SIR

 

;)

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post #12 of 15
6/12/12 at 12:53am

Hmm, pecking orders - put down the lower ones, suck up to the higher ones -  maybe you're ALL a bunch of chickenssmile.gif

 

.

"Siduri said, 'Gilgamesh, where are you roaming? You will never find the eternal life that you seek...Savour your food, make each of your days a delight, ... let music and dancing fill your house, love the child who holds you by the hand and give your wife pleasure in your embrace.'"
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post #13 of 15
6/12/12 at 1:34pm

I have never worked in a professional kitchen, just home kitchens, but I did ask my wife [before our divorce lol] "I'm going to have to weigh a lot out here hun, could you get me the long weight, please?

 

After a while I said "I've had a long wait" where have you been?"  It was blessed peace in our house for the next few hours, she left me on my own and wouldn't speak.  heaven!

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post #14 of 15
6/15/12 at 9:07am

We used to send the new guy next door for the squeegee sharpener...

They would send them to the next restaurant down as they had "loaned" it out as well!

Lots of fun!
 

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post #15 of 15
6/24/12 at 9:10am

just before the rush on a busy night i say, 'pucker up'......and i'm not talking about lips!

joey

food is like love...it should be entered into with abandon or not at all        Harriet Van Horne

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