Fair warning, this is going to be a nonsensical rant. So a little background: I've worked in what would be considered "good, high-quality" restaurants. Right now I just helped open a new Italian joint. The menu is mostly my food, and I'm getting a lot of control. I'm starting to ask myself a lot of the same questions about cooking, about the business, and myself. Some are open-ended questions, some are statements. I just need to get some stuff off my chest.
First:
So I've been cooking nonstop for the past couple years. Like I mean NON-STOP. Working 80-100 hour weeks, cooking on day offs, reading cookbooks, writing recipes. Cooking for me is an obsession that takes every minute of my life. I don't talk about anything else. I'm trying to figure out a way to balance myself. I just don't know how. I can not commit to anything else, I feel like its a waste of time. Does anyone else feel this way? How do you adjust and cope? I've opened up to a few people lately, explaining that this is literally all I do. It can be haunting but its my only real joy.
Second:
When does it stop? How do you, as a Chef, decide enough is enough? I walk through the kitchen and see 100 things I want to tell someone to clean, or re-fire some bullshit cuts, etc. I don't have the quality of staff to expect the greatness I want to see, the greatness that I know I could do if I was working the line. I don't have the commitment of my kitchen guys to push, I'm afraid that if I required them it would push them out of the kitchen and I'd have no staff. How do you delegate, create your expectation, and execute your expectations?
Third:
Dedication to local sourcing. We source aggressively local. It really brings me joy, especially when we get cool heirloom produce that no one else is seeing. I feel like shipping A5 half way around the world, or shipping in Morels from California is a total fucking cop-out. It's also a whole lot easier, you don't care about seasons because you're working with the world, not your community. Do you feel an intense responsibility to use what is close to you? Why do you not care?
Thanks /rant. Respond to whatever.
First:
So I've been cooking nonstop for the past couple years. Like I mean NON-STOP. Working 80-100 hour weeks, cooking on day offs, reading cookbooks, writing recipes. Cooking for me is an obsession that takes every minute of my life. I don't talk about anything else. I'm trying to figure out a way to balance myself. I just don't know how. I can not commit to anything else, I feel like its a waste of time. Does anyone else feel this way? How do you adjust and cope? I've opened up to a few people lately, explaining that this is literally all I do. It can be haunting but its my only real joy.
Second:
When does it stop? How do you, as a Chef, decide enough is enough? I walk through the kitchen and see 100 things I want to tell someone to clean, or re-fire some bullshit cuts, etc. I don't have the quality of staff to expect the greatness I want to see, the greatness that I know I could do if I was working the line. I don't have the commitment of my kitchen guys to push, I'm afraid that if I required them it would push them out of the kitchen and I'd have no staff. How do you delegate, create your expectation, and execute your expectations?
Third:
Dedication to local sourcing. We source aggressively local. It really brings me joy, especially when we get cool heirloom produce that no one else is seeing. I feel like shipping A5 half way around the world, or shipping in Morels from California is a total fucking cop-out. It's also a whole lot easier, you don't care about seasons because you're working with the world, not your community. Do you feel an intense responsibility to use what is close to you? Why do you not care?
Thanks /rant. Respond to whatever.