I am a student at Johnson and Wales University majoring in Culinary Arts/ Food-Service Management. I'm trying to work towards becoming a chef but I feel held back mentally. Two years ago I received my associates degree in Culinary Arts. When I started the program I was so excited to be there. Overtime I felt like I couldn't do anything right. I felt myself giving up and my grades were dropping. I was showing up late to class but not on purpose I just didn't feel I had a purpose in life anymore. It was hard to get out of bed. The only thing that pushed me a little was the fact I was paying all this money. Also my mom would encourage me by saying you only have 1 year left try to push through.
My chefs would ask me why I was doing so poorly but I couldn't talk to them about what was going on. I was taught you had to be tough in this industry and I didn't think anyone would understand me. The chefs were frustrated with me. I did great with the actual cooking but there is more to a chef than just cooking. At that time I didn't know I had depression I just knew I felt bad. I just tried to push through and thought it would get better but it had gotten worst. I almost didn't graduate in 2015. The next fall I was back at Johnson and Wales in Charlotte but left after a semester. I was getting help mentally and then coming back but ended up transferring to Johnson and Wales Online. I had gotten so nervous about coming back I just stayed online. I recently was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder/severe depression. I fell like I can't function but I'm still alive so that means I have a purpose.I am in the process of getting on medication and will continue to see my therapist. Right now I'm at about the lowest point in my life. I was mad at myself because of how I did at Johnson and Wales. The sad part is that I'm still struggling. This spring is suppose to be my last semester I graduate this May. I want to push through and work on becoming a chef. I don't want to give up I feel like I owe it to myself to follow what I want to do. I just wanted to give you some back ground information about my situation and ask for your advice on being in the Culinary Industry while dealing with mental health. Do you know any chefs that have been through it and made it. My other question is what do I tell chefs when they ask me what happened. I'm concerned that I will be turned down if I say what happened to me.
I know my journey is so far from everyone else's but please don't judge or bash. I just want to heal, grow and move forward. Thank you in advance for the advice it is greatly appreciated.
My chefs would ask me why I was doing so poorly but I couldn't talk to them about what was going on. I was taught you had to be tough in this industry and I didn't think anyone would understand me. The chefs were frustrated with me. I did great with the actual cooking but there is more to a chef than just cooking. At that time I didn't know I had depression I just knew I felt bad. I just tried to push through and thought it would get better but it had gotten worst. I almost didn't graduate in 2015. The next fall I was back at Johnson and Wales in Charlotte but left after a semester. I was getting help mentally and then coming back but ended up transferring to Johnson and Wales Online. I had gotten so nervous about coming back I just stayed online. I recently was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder/severe depression. I fell like I can't function but I'm still alive so that means I have a purpose.I am in the process of getting on medication and will continue to see my therapist. Right now I'm at about the lowest point in my life. I was mad at myself because of how I did at Johnson and Wales. The sad part is that I'm still struggling. This spring is suppose to be my last semester I graduate this May. I want to push through and work on becoming a chef. I don't want to give up I feel like I owe it to myself to follow what I want to do. I just wanted to give you some back ground information about my situation and ask for your advice on being in the Culinary Industry while dealing with mental health. Do you know any chefs that have been through it and made it. My other question is what do I tell chefs when they ask me what happened. I'm concerned that I will be turned down if I say what happened to me.
I know my journey is so far from everyone else's but please don't judge or bash. I just want to heal, grow and move forward. Thank you in advance for the advice it is greatly appreciated.